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2/9/11

never be ashamed of who you are.

so, i'm an aspiring writer.
right?
right.
and i love that about myself. i love the thought that someday i'll be a published author and someone somewhere in the universe will read my books and maybe even like them.

that being said, it may be surprising to know that i also struggle with telling people that i am a writer. i'm not sure why, but i'm always reluctant to discussing it in face to face conversations.
i'm scared of what people will think.
i'm afraid they wont like my ideas.
i'm afraid they will think i'll never achieve my dream.
i'm worried they will look down at me and laugh. "you? a writer? ha!" they'll say. and i, hanging my head in shame, will shuffle off quietly.
these are the thoughts that instantly spring to my mind when someone tries talking to me about my writing.

last night at work i was jotting down an outline for a story idea i had. while i was doing so, a co-worker of mine approached me and began asking questions about what i was doing. i was so reluctant to tell him.
it shouldn't be so hard for me to say "i want to be a writer." out loud.
yes. some people may look at me and think "yeah, right. she'll never write anything that sells." but that's not something that should stop me, right?
if writing is something i truly love and plan on doing, there should be nothing that should make me feel ashamed of that fact.

i realized that last night as the co-worker continued to ask me questions and i stumbled through my answers.
i realized that so what if he doesn't like my ideas. i'm not writing books for his personal enjoyment, am i?
so what if people think i'll never do it.
so what.
so what!

the only person that matters in this situation is me.
and i shouldn't be ashamed of wanting to be anything but what my heart desires.
i shouldn't be scared that i'll fail.
because i know i wont.

with that realization in mind, i'm begging all of you to please, never settle for less than what you deserve.
never be afraid to look someone in the eyes and with all the surety in the world express to them your dreams and aspirations.
and never, ever, EVER be ashamed of who you are.

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5 comments:

Alecia said...

not only are you an aspiring writer, but you are an INSPIRING writer. thanks for this! we all need to hear it!

Connally said...

this is splendid and inspiring! i am also an aspiring writer that struggles to feel "good enough" or "accomplished enough" to tell others.
this was exactly what i needed to hear♥
love this. and you.

Hannah Elizabeth said...

I love those realizations. I think I still need to have one. I'm struggling with the same feelings in my poetry class right now.

But hey, my poetry means something to mean, even if it doesn't to the people in my class.

Thanks Anna :-)

Jamie Walker said...

Oooh I love this. Somedays I will need to read this. I may print it out and put it in my purse haha.

Also, I passed the Versatile Blogger Award on to you! Check my blog out for the rules if you want to play along!

nothing profound said...

Relevant quote from T.S. Eliot: "For us it is just the trying; all the rest is not our business." Write, enjoy it, and let the chips fall where they may.